Last night two of my friends from work, Julie and Courtney, and I decided to up our work out routines and take a dance class for fitness. Nope, it wasn't hip hop, ballet nor a typical dance class. We all signed up and took Pole Dancing Exotic Fusion at the Girls Room on Lower Greenville.
As soon as work was over, we all changed into our slut gear...tight pants and shirts...and ran off to Lower Greenville. We stopped into Ben's bar beforehand and contemplated downing a couple of beers to help our confindence level. Lucky for us, we walked into the class stone sober.
Of course, we all lined up next to each other at our own poles in the back of the class. Then of course, the dreaded question came..."Who all has never been here before?" All three of our hands rose...therefore all three of us were split up. I was paired up with one of the workers of the Girls Room, Courtney was paired up with the instructor and Julie miraculously was by herself.
On to the pole playing...
We started stretching and loosening up for our awesome exotic dance moves. We all followed along with instructor all the while hoping her 'teasers' wouldn't pop out of her top. After stretching she went over the basics...setting our tables.
We all moved up to the pole and learned the finishing move of all dancers. You pretty much lean into the pole, bring your 'teasers' close, roll your tummy in and then you know what comes next...the 'pleaser.' After your roll your pleaser near the pole, you then stick out your butt and set the table....and as the instructor told us...take your time because this is when you get your money. Let's just say, my table setting was not very sexy and may have looked as though I was having a seizure while trying to hold onto a stripper pole.
After our table setting lesson, it was onto the pole twirling. We learned the dragon, the chair and even the warrior. We swung around and landed 'gracefully' at the bottom of the spin and finished our move with a couple of table sets. My partner was impressed by my 'newbie' skills and maybe even my table setting....not so much Courtney and Julie. Apparently I got really into my moves that I didn't know my inner stripper was trying to come out....through my backside. My pants apparently came down a bit and showed the world my polka dotted thong. Not just a little bit as Julie put it, but I had the 'Golden Arches' on display. Nice.
After our pole spins and crazy table setting with lunges and leg kicks, it was on to the floor work. Sweet Dear Jesus...I am not sure how I made it through the last 30 minutes of class. We did crazy leg lifts and an ab work out that was all stripified. Right when we thought we couldn't crunch any more, we had to do the move in Stripper time....which meant 10 times slower than normal.
Needless to say, Julie, Courtney and I all made it through the hour class a little more sweaty, a lot more sore and weak and hopefully with an extra sex appeal. I was inspired by the work out so much, I signed up for a month's membership. Now I can look forward to learning more pole moves, sexy yoga and maybe even Burlesque if I save up enough money for specialty classes.
So as we hobbled down the stairs on extremely shakey legs, the other girls decided to join me for some more classes during my membership. There was also some talk of getting some poles to perfect our moves.
So if you are female and want to try a crazy new work out, come join me....I'll be the girl with the Blue Whale Tail hanging out of my pants. ;)
